Guest Blog: Respecting Children, Creating Boundaries
By: Yvette Mora
Not my usual post, but someone has to say it.
Children need to be respected and their voice/opinion is as important as that of any adult/person of “authority.”
It irks my nerves when people expect a child to receive/welcome them with a hug and/or a kiss.
Growing up, my siblings and I were told that’s how we were to greet and say goodbye to “family.”
I hated it.....
It bothered me tons because I wasn’t inclined to doing so. I didn’t want to welcome them in my personal/private space. Heck, I didn’t even want to be in their presence for the most part, yet, I had to engage and allow such contact.
That’s the worse we can do to a child.
As for me and my children, I’ve told them that they’re to look at the person and say hi/bye, not necessarily making eye contact (unless inclined to do so). Depending on how they feel towards the individual, they are to decide whether they want to greet/say farewell with a handshake, hug, kiss, wave, etc.
I will NEVER EVER ask any child to do the contrary of their personal wishes.
We’re to pay attention to these behaviors and respect a child and each individual’s choice.
If you have a problem accepting and respecting this, then you too are part of the problem.
I don’t live in a sugar coated, cover up, blind eye world. I call it like I see it and address these things as they come up. No topic is a taboo for me and if I don’t have an answer or feel too comfortable touching a subject, I will look for a trustworthy individual to do so on my behalf.
I will not tolerate any forced behavior of any kind, regardless of who you are or feel you represent.
The ties you have to an individual doesn’t grant you any more rights than any other individual.
And no, the child is not a mal creado, grosero, rebelde, etc for choosing to have such boundaries respected.
It just so happens to be that we live in a sick,
demented, perverted world and therefore family, love, protection, honesty, and genuine amongst other things just hasn’t meshed well.
So don’t be taken by surprise when someone asks or have to repeatedly remind you of certain boundaries.